Dating Tip for Men.

You would think that working for a planning company that I would be more cognizant of activities and plans that I have scheduled. Sometimes I get proud and think that I can remember everything in my head. And every once in a while I am humbled when I make stupid decisions that prove that I can't remember everything.

I accepted an invitation to go to a play on the same night as the Relief Society birthday celebration. I look forward to the birthday party every year. As soon as I realized my mistake, I went to this guy to try to rearrange something. I was met with great indifference. Did I not express my desire to go to Relief Society enough? Did he not understand the significance of the event? He showed no sympathy for my predicament and no willingness to accommodate. It wasn't that I was rejecting him (although, after this I will), so I don't know why he reacted with such unfeeling. He was just dense and inflexible. Seeing that I was not going to get anywhere, I made it very clear to him that the ONLY reason that I was still going to go was to honor my commitment. Even then, I don't think he understood.

This is this the kind of reaction I would give if I were in his shoes. I would say, "Oh, I hate when I forget about a prior commitment. Don't worry about it. Go to the activity, and we can do something another time. I'll find someone else to go, so don't worry! It's fine." Even if I felt disappointed, I would much rather the other person be happy to do what he wanted. So, be it known that if you want to earn points, let her do the other thing, because if you show no interest in her preference, you will certainly lose points.

Easter Dress Shopping.

I remember when I was much younger my mom would buy me a new dress for Easter. I think many people have this tradition. I am not sure how it started. I guess it makes sense that Easter represents a new beginning and so new clothes would correspond. Anyway, as the Easter holiday is approaching, the thought of buying a new dress crossed my mind. I thought about going to Ross or TJMaxx to see if they had anything worth while and cheap. I never really made time for it and the idea got pushed back in my mind. Well, I went out shopping with my sister, and after some time and on the way back to her apartment, we decided to stop by Costco.

I didn't really have any intentions of buying anything, but it is a rare occasion that I go to Costco and not buy anything, so I don't know what I was thinking. It so happened that they were having a dress event. Every once in a while Costco will host some event show featuring things like art or jewelry. This time it was dresses. The brand was Mikarose. I had never heard of it before. I think it is somewhat of a specialty brand, which may be why. They emphasize modest yet fashionable dresses, so I think they are worth supporting and publicizing. They sell stuff in bridal shops from what I understand. I think they were trying to get rid of last years inventory because when I looked it up online the collection they were selling was for 2007. Now there are some styles that are more trendy and don't last as long, but if it is a classic piece, then I really don't care if it is "last year." And, the prices were decent, thanks to Costco.

My sister and I got this same dress:

Häagen-Dazs's Secret Ingredient.

The philosophy of Häagen-Dazs is "to find the purest and finest ingredients in the world and craft them into the best ice cream." So what is it that makes people praise Häagen-Dazs? It's the fat. Their ice cream has a very high fat content. You might think that it would make for a richer ice cream, which it would, but, it's not cream fat, it's vegetable oil.

This is the list of ingredients: cream, skim milk, sugar, egg yolks, natural vanilla, and vegetable oil. They figured that the cream and the egg yolks wasn't enough fat, so they added some more. Fat, fat, and more fat. Sixty-five percent of the calories is from fat. Whoa!

Today was our semi-annual unlimited ice cream day at work. They stock a small freezer of all kinds of ice cream bars. They have ice cream sandwiches, cookie sandwiches, crunch ice cream bars, and fruit popsicles. But the first thing to go is always the Häagen-Dazs ice cream bars. I think people think that the name automatically denotes quality ice cream. Sure, maybe it has the reputation for that, but I would submit to you to think otherwise.

From Wikipedia (and because of Wikipedia's unquestionable accuracy, I will not pretend to claim authority on this) I learned that the name Häagen-Dazs is not Scandinavian as people think it is. It is just "two made-up words meant to look Scandinavian to American eyes. In fact, the letter combinations "äa" and "zs" are impossible in all Scandinavian languages." It is ironic that although Häagen-Dazs operates in 54 countries around the world, none of the company's 700 stores is in any Scandinavian country. They don't want to be caught for using a phony name. What I think it most hilarious is that the name, as it is pronounced in English, is very close to the Persian (Iranian) term for "garbage can." And that is exactly where I try to put any excess, removable fat. Unfortunately, it is kind of hard to take the fat out of the ice cream.

While I am on the topic, I once tried the Wal-mart brand of fat-free, sugar-free vanilla ice cream. It's nasty. Don't even bother. If you are going to put it in a shake or make something else with it, it would work just fine. But the flavor is awful and doesn't even come close to a regular vanilla flavor. (I put in some pumpkin puree and some spices and it turned out great.) On the other hand, I often buy Kroger ice cream. It is relatively cheap when it is on sale. I never buy their regular version. The light kind tastes just fine. I've tried four or five different flavors and they all taste as good as the regular kind.

Is There a Line for Gentlemanliness?

On Tuesday evenings I take a step aerobic class to give variety to my work out. The other night a new couple came to the class. As typical, we all wait outside the door while the yoga class leaves. This man held open the door, let his wife pass, and then motioned for me to pass. I though, how polite, and went though. What I wasn't expecting, though, was that he lead me though with his hand on my back. I wasn't quite sure what to think of it. I do know that it wasn't meant in any romantic way toward me, but I still wondered why. These are my two conclusions. It's a habit and he forgot that his wife already went in before me, or it is something he does for everyone no matter who. Either way, it is a very gentlemanly thing for him to do. But I ask the question, is there a line for this sort of behavior?

I enthusiastically applaud his courtesy toward his wife and think she must sure appreciate his attentiveness, but do you think his gesture was appropriate for a complete stranger? I, of course, like it when a date or any guy for that matter shows that courtesy toward me, but considering that he is married to someone else kind of make it awkward.

I favor the conclusion that it was just a habit and didn't think anything of it at the time. To which I would hope that other guys treat their wives with such respect and so frequently that it is a completely natural thing for them to do.

How to Predict the Future.

A neighbor once gave my family a little lesson on how we could predict the future. His theory was that the more information you have regarding a particular thing the better you could predict what will happen. You may be thinking, well duh. Yes, his theory is nothing more than common sense, but unfortunately, there seems to be a lack of that in the world.

A certain incident happened over the weekend that followed this pattern. I found out Friday night that my dad might have had a heart attack. I was not surprised. That is not to say that I didn't care or that I wasn't worried. I was. But I wasn't surprised. And this is why. Two years or so ago (more or less, I lose track of time) my uncle had a stroke and after some tests found out that he needed some major heart surgery. Originally the doctors had planned on quintuple bypass surgery but ended up combining two by passes, making it 'just' quadruple bypass. Then about a year ago, my other uncle (brothers) was having some dizzy spells. His son took him to the hospital, and the doctors treated him immediately and put in a pace maker. My grandfather (my dad's dad) also had heart problems. Fact 1: Heart problems run in the family.

About two months ago, my dad was doing his regular exercises in the park and put his legs over his head. He felt some chest pain that never really went away. He thought it was just a pulled muscle. (Yeah...his heart muscle.) He didn't tell anyone this until after all this came about. Fact 2: He has chest pain.

One night when we were all in St. George, we got on the subject of my uncle's heart beat. Supposedly the mechanical pump made a different noise than a normal heart would. My cousin listened to it but couldn't really tell a difference, so he listened to my dad's heart to compare. He said that my dad's heart was beating twice as fast. My aunt then decided to bring out the blood pressure taker and we all took a turn. The machine did in fact indicate that my dad's heart rate was twice as fast as it should have been. I was 150. No one really knew what to think of it. I thought it might be the stress that he was feeling at the time. Fact 3: He has an abnormal heart beat.

Given those fact, you would think that my dad would have been a little more concerned. According to my neighbor's theory, we could assume ('predict') that he would have a heart attack. Because of the information we had, anything serious was prevented/ Because as fortune had it, my uncle went down to Arizona for a doctor's appointment just two days after we were there. At the appointment, he happened to mention my dad's heart rate. The doctor told him to tell my dad to get to the hospital right away. My dad did, and his heart problems were verified. They put in a balloon pump to give his heart a rest and to regulate it. They also did an angioplasty and put in a stent (something he would have to have done three more times, for each artery).

A cardiogram revealed that my dad did not have a heart attack, but that the vessels had narrowed. I can only imagine that he would have had major heart failure had he not taken care of it when he had. His heart was beating twice as fast for so long that it was just exhausted. After a while, I am sure it would have overworked itself to the point of stopping.

I know there was some divine intervention. Had the topic not come up, it probably would never have been a concern. God works through ordinary means sometimes.

Fascination of the Abomination.

On my way to work this morning, I was stuck for 20 minutes behind a non-existent accident. I can't trust radio reports of traffic. It always seems that I happen to be in the exact location of a reported accident, but there is never anything there. Sometimes there is traffic, sometimes there isn't. There isn't any consistency for me to do anything about these reports when I hear them. Well, this morning there was a notice on one of those over head light boards that said that there was a crash on the I-215 at 200 North. Due to my lack of trust in the accuracy of traffic notices, I disregarded it and took my normal route to work, on the I-215. At about 1700 North, I was going 15 mph. I was going between 5-10 mph for about 20 minutes. I thought, well, at least I know that once I get to 200 North, it will clear up. I was patient and accepted my punishment for not heading the warning.

Eventually, I got to 200 North, fully expecting to see an accident. If I had waited 20 minutes to get two miles, there had better been something worthy of the hold-up. There was nothing there. No smashed cars. No police or emergency vehicles. No tow-trucks. Nothing. So, why were people going so slowly? Sure, the accident could have been cleared by the time I got there. The only evidence of any accident was tire tracks in the snow on the left shoulder. But still, if there was nothing there, I ask again, why were people going so slowly?

A literature teacher once explained it to me. It is what Joseph Conrad in his book Heart of Darkness called "fascination of the abomination." We've all experienced it. There are a couple of cars on the side of the road, and maybe a police car, but there is no blockage of the lanes, the cars are not impeding the flow of traffic, yet there is still slowing. Why? Because people are fascinated with the misfortune of others. They think that if they slow down enough they will be able to know exactly what happened, how the victims are doing, and whose fault it was. Of course no one can figure that out by just looking. So why bother to slow down? Drive on! I'm sure the people involved don't want people staring at them; they don't want the extra attention. I guess it is just human instinct. Some people are just more fascinated than others.

So, my only two explanations for the delay this morning was that either there was indeed an accident and people slowed down to see it or there was no accident but the sign made people curious so they slowed down anyway hoping to see something. Heaven forbid they should miss it. Whichever the case, there is still no excuse for the back-up. People: Mind your own business and move on!

Plant Murderers!

I don't have pets. I think they are a little too hard to take care of for someone who is never home. So, I have lots of plants. A few of them I grew from clippings from other plants, but most of them I got...from the trash bin! Yes, I admit it, I've been dumpster diving. But what should be more shocking to you is that my work is full of plant murderers! Most of my plants I have gotten from the garbage. This is my most recent acquisition:


Now, is that any way to treat this plant? Sure, it is a little viny and malnurished, but it is a perfectly good plant. It will do nicely once I put it in some good soil. There is no reason for it to have been thrown away. If people could be held accountable for plant murder like they do people or even animals, there would be a lot of people paying hefty fines and doing community service. We have the ASPCA, why isn't there an ASPCP? Do plants not feel pain, do they not have a spirit? Sure they do. So why are people less caring and more dismissive of them? I don't understand.